Maybe like in those horror movies, where the audience knows what will happen if that girl opens the door or walks up to the attic, we walk to our tragedy with the same obliviousness. After all, the audience has the knowledge of watching a horror movie and there is this scary music preparing them for the awaiting fate of the character. Yet, that girl is moving in her own safety zone and understandably not expecting any dramatic turn in her story.
Now, looking back, I see I have missed many signs myself. Because I was in my own safety zone, because I didn’t have any reason to expect any dramatic turn.
1. Not only ventriloquists project their own opinions through the mouths of ‘others’. 2. Obviously there is a virtue called ‘catching the essence of a relationship only by a glimps of a screen’. 3. If you aren’t ashamed about an aspect of your life yourself no one’s opinion on that matter will make you feel ashamed.
One day you wake up and see another version of yourself from your past standing there looking at you. You remember the things that version did or things that person said and all that feels strange to you. You remember in what kind of a state of mind all that have been said or done but you cannot remember what it felt like.
I am a person of contradictions. I highly believe that you should be a whole on your own and I’ve never understood people who used expressions like “I cannot live without…”. The contradiction part is that I also believe in a refusal of doing so. There is a difference between “not being able to” and “not wanting to” and that nuance makes it possible to face the ‘you’ from your past without questioning your dignity. I think that it’s what gets you on your knees that matter, not the fact that you were on your knees. After all, how are you supposed to have ideals if you aren’t willing to burn yourself for them.
Sometimes I come across things which fascinate me to a certain point that I am not equipped to express my fascination without looking like a mad person. Most of the time people throw me that certain suspecting look, trying to calculate the danger they are in while I talk about the thing I happen to find awesome. (I have to add to that, that I am a loud person who talks in different voices depending on the context and talks with her hands and arms a lot.)
I have always had a thing for children’s books. I could look at the illustrations for hours as they tend to be filled with wonderful details. Everything is colourful and endearing and I feel like, the characters in those books are living their own lives in a parallel world. (I suppose this is what happens when you grow up with comic books and strips.)
So, here it comes: I think I am in love with the details in Oliver Jeffers’ drawings. Here is an example; the shadows, the expression on the penguin’s face while he holds that guitar and ofcourse the hand on the face during the game…Simply wonderful.
P.S.: Aren’t you happy that you got to read about this fascination and didn’t need to watch me talking about it with my hands and arms and a mad look in my eyes? You are welcome!
P.P.S.: If I were a zombie, I would certainly go after the brains of illustrators! Wonderful worlds in there.